MARRIAGE : THE SOCIAL TRAP

What is the first thing that comes in your mind when you hear Marriage?
I think of irritating family members I have never seen before, overly dressed unknown and hungry crowd, desperate and drunk men, all gathered together to eat, basically. They don't give a shit about the Bride and Groom. And why should they? Marriage has nothing to do with them, most marriages are more like a slavery business.

We  have this thing called "Arrange Marriage" which is a concept practiced by the society where parents are the decision makers of their child's life till they die. Even though we see so many love marriages these days, majority of marriages are still arranged by the family members and it's not going away anytime soon. Arrange marriages appeal to parents because they have the control over it, if their children ever decide to split, they can force them to stay together, basically they don't trust their children with their pretentious status in the society, and are obsessed with the log kya kahenge mentality.

Even though a lot of people love to say "things are changing these days, people are "letting" their daughters live their lives the way they want to", I want to tell them a) percentage of such people is very low and b) they are living in a bubble of their own statistics.  

Because last time I checked this was still the same fucked up nation where bride slavery has become a common phenomena and we are competing with countries like Afghanistan, Bangladesh, Nepal in child marriage.

So no, Indian Parents haven't given up, they are still not willing to give their children the basic right to choose their life partner. Love marriage is still considered a bad thing, families try to hide it as much as they can so no one could question their pretentious family values.

I don't have anything against arrange marriage, I just don't understand it. I don't know how parents are always confident that this guy is perfect for my daughter, he is a decent guy and belongs to a reputed family. Hold on, how do you know he is decent, do you even know if your own daughter is decent? What if the guy, has cheated on all of his ex girlfriends, likes to take a trip to Kasol every now and then, has major commitment issues? He is most certainly not going to tell all this to his family.

Marriage is not even the worst part, worst part starts once the couple is happily married. You got married to someone you have never met before, asked to sleep with him and in some cases unknowingly got raped on the very first night of that fancy wedding. But no one will call this rape, it will be called her duty and the most disturbing thing is, her own parents GAVE the green signal this time.

Domestic violence, sexual abuse in a marriage is not rare, and we have two types of reaction towards it, One, we refuse to recognize this as a crime and force the girl to bear everything or best give birth to a child so everyone can again start practicing their brainwashing skills to create another fucked up piece.

Two, the reaction from our so called "Elite" class, blame the victim when she is in her most vulnerable position, tell her it's her fault, why is she allowing him to treat her this way? She should pull herself together and fight. And when she asks, will you support me, she gets silence or judgment "Don't you people ask for equality, fight on your own !! "

I wonder if it's actually a girl's fault to stay in an abusive relationship, or it's the society where everyone keeps reminding her she is a woman in man's world. She has no identity if it's not for her husband. Only purpose of her life is to make her husband happy and if she ever dare to leave him, no one will take her back or support her. And sadly no one taught her to fight on her own.

All these things can't change in a day, it'll take time but they will never change until we recognize them as problems but one thing is certain we won't move forward if 48% of the population is left behind.

Patriotism Or Terrorism !!

What is the difference between Patriotism and Terrorism? Or they are just synonyms to one another. 

I happened to watch Snowden, and there was this scene which goes like -"...five, four,three,two,one. Engage target. Attack." And with the target, four-five random people are gone in a cloud of dust.

Middle east countries have become a video game for USA, they are looking at them on their screens all the time and the moment they "feel" something is wrong, BOOM and there goes the cloud of dust. Two-three causalities with that one "potential" threat are normal. But those two-three casualties have now become thousands of innocent human lives. Those lives are not worth anyone's time. Those people are just objects on a computer screen. 

Everyday people come out of their houses, not knowing if they will make it back or not. Imagine a kid, who has seen this horror throughout his childhood, someone from somewhere dropped a bomb and his parents, his friends were dead in a matter of few seconds. They have been paying a price for the crime they never committed. Their own home, their own country has become someone else's battleground so at last those people decided to retaliate, and are called terrorists.

Look at the another scenario, after tolerating Britishers for years, American colonies retaliated. They did it because Britishers invaded their country and imposed their rules on them. And when people couldn't tolerate their inhuman behavior, they decided to fight back. It gave birth to the great American Revolution, this was called Patriotism. But from British point of view it was an act of Terrorism

I do not support terrorism at any cause, you can't justify killing an innocent person just because something bad happened to you. All I am saying is, some of them are trying to defend their country from foreign invasion, just because you are a powerful country, doesn't give you the right to decide the future of every nation on the map. 

How would Americans feel if there were drones over their heads all the time? Imagine the psychological situation of those middle east countries, to erase some potential threats thousands of innocent people are killed every year. Casualties in countries like Pakistan and Afghanistan due to American drone attacks are way more than 9/11 casualties and people are still dying because one douche bag attacked the world's most powerful country. 

So it doesn't matter if it's a terrorist activity or a patriotic one, innocents pay the ultimate price !!!

Where has happiness vanished !!!

According to WHO report India is the 2nd most depressed nation in the entire world, even Pakistan is better than us. And India has the world's largest youth population so basically young people are depressed. 

We spent our childhood running behind some dreams which were given to us by our parents or our society. And in the process we forgot to live. We set a reminder that once this race is over, we'll enjoy life. It wasn't our fault, we were programmed like this. We didn't even realize when and how that race trapped us, it became an infinite loop and now we don't know how to get out of it.

This is the story of almost every youngster in our country. Some of us were able to fulfill all those dreams and some of us failed miserably. But none of us is happy. That dream of good paying job was supposed to bring us happiness, but it became something our parents could boast about. 

No one ever asked that highly successful kid, who is finding his happiness in pubs every Friday night, is he happy? Why would anyone bother, he is supposed to be happy, he has everything now. And that's what life is about, right?

And there is another kind, the one's who failed, there lives were made miserable by everyone around them, sometimes to an extend that they had to end it. Those who are still breathing are still struggling, fighting with themselves because they have lost faith in their own talent. Something inside them is broken and it can not be fixed. 

I haven't seen a single happy face around me in a long time, I have seen people pretending to be happy and that's more irritating. Drinking few beers, getting high is the new happy in town. Or changing the city, leaving for some another country to find new motivation in life is another. We are running after the temporary solution because we live in the present moment, right? But those beers come with a bad hangover and an addiction, they do create an illusion but that's it. Is it how we wanna live the only life we get? 

We are wasting our numbered days doing things we don't like, living with strangers, the people we really love are far away, the things we wanna do are still in that bucket we created.

Love is the only positive energy around, and we don't have that energy in our life anymore. We don't love the work we do, we don't love the people we live with. What exactly this generation is trying to achieve? 

The beginning......

The beginning......

             

I come from a society where birth of a boy is celebrated, overly excited parents organize a big event and invite useless family members and waste their money, time and energy.

I mean how does it matter if it's a boy or a girl, you gave birth to another life, isn't it a big enough reason to celebrate?? 

Well NO, in my society it's not. If it's a girl it's a sign that the mother will have to bear another child, nothing else!!

And we talk about equality in THIS society. There will be no equality until  we stop crying when a girl is born. You never wanted her in this world, how the hell you will treat her equally, when she will always be a sign of her parents loosing to the probability of having a boy. She was never the first choice even on the day she was born and this fact remains with her parents no matter how much they love her.

The regret of having a girl is always there with them and that regret in her parents's eyes makes her the weaker sex. She will always feel the burden her parents felt. We make our girls feel lesser, we make her feel she is unwanted in this society.

I find it funny when a guy says- "I respect women but so many of them are not willing to respect themselves, they don't think they are capable enough to compete with men". Who made her think like that??? Why don't we see a guy's mind wired like that?? 

The answer is simple, next time you hear a woman say that, It's YOU, who made her feel and think that way, every element involved in our society made her feel that way. 

She was never given a chance to build a personality, she's been busy proving her worth and begging for approval from the society. 

THE MUCH AWAITED GAME !!

                                                                 IT'S 6-0 FOR INDIA 

As it happened, the most talked about match of world cup 2015 "India Vs Pakistan" ended yesterday. India won by 76 run at Adelaide Oval. The entire nation was  happy. Indians were celebrating their victory all over the world.
But in a small village of Kashmir, one parent was worried about his son who was studying in Delhi. For him it was not a time of celebration. He was just praying that next morning when he calls his son, some stranger does not answer it. One family at border of India-Pakistan was horrified and couldn't sleep because they knew that at anytime after the result was declared, firecrackers would come from the other side.
India-Pakistan cricket match is not just a match, this is an another occasion for people from both sides to show their hatred towards each other. Everybody gets involved in this match, from the prime minister to a normal rickshaw wala, and for the poor players its a do or die situation. People won't mind if they lose the world cup but a defeat against Pakistan will not be tolerated. And after the match, if fans have gun in their hands, they might just shoot at each other.
Irony is Indian prime minister Mr. Modi called Nawaz Sharif to wish him for world cup in Australia but when Indian soldiers were dying at border, he refused to talk to Pakistan.
What a democratic country we have, where we have freedom of speech and expressing our opinions but when a Kashmiri muslim chose to support Pakistan's team, he got killed.
Way to go India....!!!